Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
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