Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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