the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
