GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
People with herpes should wear stickers.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
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