her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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