Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
