So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
areolas are like halos for boobs.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
Randomize