OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
