Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Randomize
