Texts From Last Night

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  (408): View more from California

  i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.

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  (408): i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked. http://tfl.nu/0z4b
  Replies (12) Good night (3480) Bad night (576)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  I haven't been this sober since birth.

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  (609): I haven't been this sober since birth. http://tfl.nu/qg8c
  Replies (15) Good night (1285) Bad night (2762)
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  (+44): View more from England

  Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.

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  (+44): Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call. http://tfl.nu/fjfe
  Replies (35) Good night (4504) Bad night (603)
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  (712): View more from Iowa

  The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.

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  (712): The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place. http://tfl.nu/0x49
  Replies (39) Good night (920) Bad night (6930)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.

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  (360): I'll bring the barf blanket just in case. http://tfl.nu/d0c2
  Replies (6) Good night (930) Bad night (2480)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak

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  (847): he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak http://tfl.nu/y31q
  Replies (18) Good night (1301) Bad night (5291)
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."

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  (573): I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use." http://tfl.nu/1qa0
  Replies (8) Good night (5649) Bad night (910)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch

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  (419): His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch http://tfl.nu/wbxj
  Replies (13) Good night (4249) Bad night (1566)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.

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  (215): the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul. http://tfl.nu/vout
  Replies (11) Good night (1859) Bad night (835)
• Favorite

  (778): View more from British Columbia

  Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.

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  (778): Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP. http://tfl.nu/dcb2
  Replies (4) Good night (1591) Bad night (529)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.

  (708): View more from Illinois

  And it tastes incredible.

  (708): View more from Illinois

  And I have chest pains.

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  (708): I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee. (708): And it tastes incredible. (708): And I have chest pains. http://tfl.nu/iw1m
  Replies (6) Good night (1285) Bad night (547)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.

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  (612): So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision. http://tfl.nu/oggj
  Replies (5) Good night (391) Bad night (1099)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.

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  (530): It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you. http://tfl.nu/5i3v
  Replies (4) Good night (564) Bad night (325)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.

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  (612): I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin. http://tfl.nu/dn4i
  Replies (1) Good night (329) Bad night (534)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.

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  (602): So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk. http://tfl.nu/56hg
  Replies (2) Good night (379) Bad night (546)

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