Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
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