Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
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