somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
