It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
