i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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