oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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