i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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