Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
he told me I talked like a deaf person
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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