Already got asked if we're dating
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
