do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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