Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
