And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
