I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
