Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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