Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize
