i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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