The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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