ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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