Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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