So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
then he tried to convert me to islam
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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