Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
