Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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