Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
