Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Randomize
