too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Randomize