Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
