He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
there is puke in my bra ... again
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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