Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
My penis needs a shock collar
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
