Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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