I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Randomize