He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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