She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize