you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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