I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Randomize