im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
