When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
is this the sara with the beer cane?
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
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