Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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