Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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