nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
