i'm signing you up for texting rehab
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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