i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
is that a dick in a sweater?
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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