the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
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