you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
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