Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
